What is the fuzzy index?

Today - fuzzy index from 9 down to 5 (10 total fog, 0 clear)


Today the fuzzy fog began to slowly lift. What is this fog? I don't know, sort of a dull feeling I seem to carry around in my brain. What causes it - could it be toxins in the body, dehydration, depression, stress, tiredness - maybe a little of all of these.





I sat in my special chair and looked out the window at my special tree and just tried to calm my mind for 15 minutes before work started. I work from home, so work was only in the next room. My partner knew I needed quiet and I also turned off the computer speakers, and shut the door to my office. I thought of a quality I needed at the beginning and end of the meditation. That quality was - STRENGTH.

Again, a day where things went more smoothly than usual. I had more patience when dealing with my workmate, and it wasn't a hassle to go and buy food in the afternoon, a task I normally don't enjoy. As I walked up the aisles of fruit and veg I felt grateful for all the work that others had done to make my life so easy.

We cooked dinner cooperatively, and I was offered a glass of wine. Immediately I said "No thanks." - the STRENGTH came into being. I just didn't want to and I felt the fog lift a little more. I felt in control and I reflected about how many creative hours I could capture by not collapsing in front of TV with a glass of wine. Could it be 5 a week - more? That could add up to 300 or more hours a year. Not only that, but on weekends, I might wake up feeling fresh and get more out of those days off, as well.

It's a bit of a change - I do have some time now, about an hour, to work on something I want to do before bed. I have decided I will do something purely for pleasure now. What will it be?
I would like to do a little sewing and then read my new magazine, with a cup of herb tea and honey. That will be nice.

Meditate on this ......

This is a picture I borrowed from my favourite blog - Zen Habits.

There is so much content on this blog - I really recommend it for anyone who wants to simplify their life, get more out of life and get better organised while feeling healthier and happier.

Meditation is an important part of Leo's life. I would like it to be part of mine too. This morning I started and tried about 10 minutes of quiet breathing and calming. I can honestly say that when things occurred later in the day which would normally leave me frazzled I coped really well with them, and therefore I had much more energy left over. This can be put to better use than feeling stressed or depressed.

Another thing I want to do is eat very healthy and to eliminate alcohol from my life. I feel that I need all the creative time I can get, and there is so much time wasted on social drinking, and getting over the effects of this the next day, not to mention heavy and unhealthy meals. Simply - I just want to feel aware all the time and not numb. If there is pain to be felt I want to feel it, not avoid it. I want to deal with things. I also want to feel the joy and clarity of mind that comes with being creative.

This is a bit of a change from the emphasis on finances - but finances alone won't make you happy. There is much much more to life than just money in the bank. By not drinking I will be a little lonely in my peer group, but I can deal with that. You know, it's a bit sad isn't it that the non drinker might be the odd one out. Maybe one day things might be different. The Positive Revolution - (Edward de Bono) might see things change this way if enough people change their habits. I can be one.